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The Neurotic Parent's Guide­ to College Admissions
Strategies for Helicoptering, Hot-Housing & Micromanaging

Rating
Format
Paperback, 256 pages
Published
United States, 1 February 2012


Introduction: Orientation to College Angst



1. The Most Difficult Time to Get Into College in the History of the World

Frightening statistics, shocking pie charts, depressing bar graphs



2. Let the Anxiety Begin

Why you need a bunch of expensive helpers to get your kid to write a decent two-page essay



3. The Early Years

Yes, you really do need to kiss up to the director of the Yellow Balloon Preschool



4. Lining Up Your Ducks

It's never to early to begin padding your resume



5. The College List

How to narrow down the list to 29



6. The College Tour

The trip of a lifetime: Quality bonding or a damaged relationship forever?



7. Testing

Hands down, the worst part of the admissions process (until your kid gets a 2260)



8. The Essay

Let your "you" shine through, even if it's a you conjured up by an independent college counselor



9: The Uncommon App

OMG! I was supposed to get awards? And have activities? They're telling me that now?



10. Advanced Application Strategies

Organizational advice and obscure last-minute passions for teens and their meddling parents



11. Financial Aid

Can anyone spare $250K?



12. Diversity

Transgenderism, the Lost Boys of Sudan, North Dakota and more



13. Waiting

At this point in the process, your teen is probably not speaking to you, so it's time to let go of your controlling ways



14. Rejected/Deferred

What to expect when they're rejecting



15. Accepted

What a relief! Now your child can forget about changing the world and go back to playing video games



16. Separation Anxiety

If you're the emotional type, skip this chapter



17. Bed Bath & Bye-Bye

Empty nests on sale-20% off



18. College Life

"If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want to get an education, go to the library"-Frank Zappa



19. Round Two

Having a second child gives you the chance to make the same lame mistakes all over again, plus many new ones



20. Barista Readiness

A college degree is fine, but at the end of the day, they'd better know how to prepare a venti, sugar-free, nonfat, vanilla soy, double-shot, decaf, no-foam, extra-hot, peppermint white chocolate mocha with extra syrup



The Neurotic Parent Glossary

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Product Description


Introduction: Orientation to College Angst



1. The Most Difficult Time to Get Into College in the History of the World

Frightening statistics, shocking pie charts, depressing bar graphs



2. Let the Anxiety Begin

Why you need a bunch of expensive helpers to get your kid to write a decent two-page essay



3. The Early Years

Yes, you really do need to kiss up to the director of the Yellow Balloon Preschool



4. Lining Up Your Ducks

It's never to early to begin padding your resume



5. The College List

How to narrow down the list to 29



6. The College Tour

The trip of a lifetime: Quality bonding or a damaged relationship forever?



7. Testing

Hands down, the worst part of the admissions process (until your kid gets a 2260)



8. The Essay

Let your "you" shine through, even if it's a you conjured up by an independent college counselor



9: The Uncommon App

OMG! I was supposed to get awards? And have activities? They're telling me that now?



10. Advanced Application Strategies

Organizational advice and obscure last-minute passions for teens and their meddling parents



11. Financial Aid

Can anyone spare $250K?



12. Diversity

Transgenderism, the Lost Boys of Sudan, North Dakota and more



13. Waiting

At this point in the process, your teen is probably not speaking to you, so it's time to let go of your controlling ways



14. Rejected/Deferred

What to expect when they're rejecting



15. Accepted

What a relief! Now your child can forget about changing the world and go back to playing video games



16. Separation Anxiety

If you're the emotional type, skip this chapter



17. Bed Bath & Bye-Bye

Empty nests on sale-20% off



18. College Life

"If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want to get an education, go to the library"-Frank Zappa



19. Round Two

Having a second child gives you the chance to make the same lame mistakes all over again, plus many new ones



20. Barista Readiness

A college degree is fine, but at the end of the day, they'd better know how to prepare a venti, sugar-free, nonfat, vanilla soy, double-shot, decaf, no-foam, extra-hot, peppermint white chocolate mocha with extra syrup



The Neurotic Parent Glossary

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Product Details
EAN
9780983459415
ISBN
098345941X
Other Information
Illustrated
Dimensions
20.8 x 14 x 1.8 centimeters (0.38 kg)

Table of Contents

Introduction: Orientation to College Angst

1. The Most Difficult Time to Get Into College in the History of the World
Frightening statistics, shocking pie charts, depressing bar graphs

2. Let the Anxiety Begin
Why you need a bunch of expensive helpers to get your kid to write a decent two-page essay

3. The Early Years
Yes, you really do need to kiss up to the director of the Yellow Balloon Preschool

4. Lining Up Your Ducks
It’s never to early to begin padding your resume

5. The College List
How to narrow down the list to 29

6. The College Tour
The trip of a lifetime: Quality bonding or a damaged relationship forever?

7. Testing
Hands down, the worst part of the admissions process (until your kid gets a 2260)

8. The Essay
Let your “you” shine through, even if it's a you conjured up by an independent college counselor

9: The Uncommon App
OMG! I was supposed to get awards? And have activities? They’re telling me that now?

10. Advanced Application Strategies
Organizational advice and obscure last-minute passions for teens and their meddling parents

11. Financial Aid
Can anyone spare $250K?

12. Diversity
Transgenderism, the Lost Boys of Sudan, North Dakota and more

13. Waiting
At this point in the process, your teen is probably not speaking to you, so it’s time to let go of your controlling ways

14. Rejected/Deferred
What to expect when they’re rejecting

15. Accepted
What a relief! Now your child can forget about changing the world and go back to playing video games

16. Separation Anxiety
If you’re the emotional type, skip this chapter

17. Bed Bath & Bye-Bye
Empty nests on sale—20% off

18. College Life
“If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want to get an education, go to the library”—Frank Zappa

19. Round Two
Having a second child gives you the chance to make the same lame mistakes all over again, plus many new ones

20. Barista Readiness
A college degree is fine, but at the end of the day, they’d better know how to prepare a venti, sugar-free, nonfat, vanilla soy, double-shot, decaf, no-foam, extra-hot, peppermint white chocolate mocha with extra syrup

The Neurotic Parent Glossary

Promotional Information

Ongoing promotion and publicity tied to continuing author speaking engagements

About the Author

J.D. Rothman: J.D. (Judy) Rothman is an Emmy-winning screenwriter and lyricist specializing in comedy and children's programming. She coped with the stress of her son's college-application process by becoming the blogger The Neurotic Parent, which later inspired the book. She also contributed to I'm Going to College, Not You (St. Martin's).

Reviews

"If you need a good laugh at how crazy the college admissions process has become, this is a book for you. Rothman, a television comedy writer, subtly weaves good advice about encouraging students to strike a healthy balance, find their passion and communicate that to colleges." -- Charlotte Observer

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